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I’ve been a little depressed as of late, myself.  You know how guys in jail can get.  I had some guy tell me I should have killed myself after Zina, “She went out gangsta.”

I was thinking, “Yeah, and she left our son and me here.”  as I walked away.  This guy is obviously not the brightest bulb in the box.  Still, it left me angry at Zina again.

Once guy tried to convince me she may still be alive, “You don’t know.  She could be in protective custody.”  I  swear.  I’m surrounded by lawyers and psychologists in here.  Luckily, I”m a little too bright to fall for this shit.

Still… my grieving for Zina is a manic call back.  some days, I’m fine.  Other days it’s a relentless roller coaster.

Just when I had given up on talking to anyone, I had a guy I didn’t recognize call me “Dirty.(my tag name.)”  We started talking and I  asked him if he knew Zina.  He said yes, “She was a beautiful girl.”

When he said that all these images of her, the really good times came flooding back.  That’s when I realized that that’s how I want to remember her.. as beautiful.

I can’t tell you why or how I endure this.  I do believe there’s a reason I’m still alive.  I don’t know why, but I plan on finding out.

I’d enjoy mail from anyone.  My address is:

Michael McQuade / Somerset County Jail / 132 East Madison Road / Madison, Maine 04950.

Tell everyone that I said “hi!”

God bless,

Dirty

Dirty

 

Hey, Circle.

How are you?  I got your letter this afternoon.  I was glad I could call you guys for hell, you really are the only friends I have had.

I know what you guys are saying about Dark Star, but I doubt I will ever get back with Lori even though I wish that I could but Hell…

I don’t know what DHS has to say about the kids, but you can bet I will see my kids, for I will fight until I die.  I would let them keep putting me back here just to see my kids.

I guess you could say after I get out I will be okay, even if I don’t come back to Maine, for I will always land on my feet for, Hell, God has not let me down yet.

I would say that even if my mom said I could stay there, Cherokee shouldn’t matter for he is eighteen now so who knows.  But I guess you could say I will do something.

I do get out for a walk a few times a week, lifting.  I just have not had the time for that, but I should be getting more time now I am done with DEFY for next monday is the final test for my class but I also been putting a lot of time in the Church stuff as you always see.

I guess you could say I am going to close for now, but I will write you guys more.  Soon I need to find some more stamps for I used the money my mom put on my account on the phone.

God bless,

Joel Dudley

joel

Robin,

As far as my family goes, I don’t know what I might had done, but I guess they are all mad at me or something. Yeah, they didn’t send me a card for Mother’s day and I haven’t gotten a letter from my mom or my son.

I had a girlfriend in here since November, but she left in May to go to rehab. She wrote to me, but I still miss her. I am making a blanket with her name on it. I get to have a blanket, shower bag, make up bag wash clothe and a pair of slippers. I think we an also have three pairs of homemade socks also. My son is with my mom and he has been.

I guess you could say I have an attitude like a dove. I wish that I could have a dove again. You said there is a pic on facebook of me with purple hair. Can you look up stuff like pics and stuff? If you can my pics of my doves are on there.

Well, talk to you later.

Lawless.

arline-lawless-7

Hey,

Sorry my memory is such shit during that particular period of my life.  I was pretty fucked up.  sorry that it’s taken so long to write back.  Kennebec had me on suicide watch til they shipped me here.  A month and a week.  Just over a week in the turtle suit along.  When they shipped me they left all my paperwork and all.  It took a month just to get some of my shit.

I had almost forgotten your letter.  It fell out of my tome of paperwork the other day.  I was glad because I wanted to thank you for your letter.  Only a few people can realize what a piece of mail can mean to someone.  Especially someone with as much shit as I’m going through..

I can’t talk about my case at all Not only because of the severe nature of the case, but also do to the lack of info on the case.  I  don’t know what the fuck is going on.

I’m surprisingly optimistic for a guy facing life. I’m working out, reading, writing.  I”m clean of drugs.  That’s something I really wanted towards the end.  I tried to get into a detox.  There were no beds open at the time.

I don’t really want to get into the whole mess.  It really hurts thinking of Zina and our son, Loki.  He’s fine which is something, I guess.

I really wanted you to know that I appreciated that letter.  I thank you for your prayers.  You’re in mine as well.  If I ever get outta this place, I’ll give you a ring.

Again, thanks,

Dirty

Dirty

Circle,How are you?  I guess you could say it has been going okay, for now.  I sit here in my cell at 130am, just can’t get shit off my head.

I did find a couple of things I meant to send you guys a wile back for the website but of course I forgot to send them.

Fuck, I really don’t know what to do for Lori and the kids are and always will be my world.  I just don’t know.

I guess you could say all I do is teach my class and watch t.v. for the rest of my time but I can also say I try to call my mom and Lori everyday for I keep my hopes up but who knows, right?

SO I guess you could say you guys are the only people who I hear from.  I just don’t know what the fuck it seems all of my family and friends have left me behind.  I guess you could say I write them, but don’t hear back.

I guess you could say I should lay down so yes, If I can fall asleep then I should try.  But I will of course write you guys more over this weekend so please whatever you do keep in touch for I could always use a friend.

God bless,

Joel Dudley

joel

Circle,

How are you ? I guess you could say I have seen a lot better days – I still have not heard from Lori and the kids but of course, who knows.

Sorry I have not written for a little bit, I have had some medical problems in the past few months. I have been having some really bad, light headed dizzy spells. Medical here really don’t know what they are doing for all they keep saying is “drink more water” but of course you know how doctors in prison are for fuck, I just wish I could stop being dizzy for some days I can’t even get out of bed.

I guess you could say I still feel lost, for I don’t really hear from anyone but you guys, or I should say “you” for you’re it.

So have you heard from Dark Star, for yes, it would be great to hear from her. But, if you guys want she can send me more pictures just like you guys can as well.

I guess I will let you go for now, for I need to work on what I’m doing in class tomorrow, so if you need it I can give you my second copy, when it comes to class for yes, I have two weeks left of my defy class I took. You should look up defyventures.org. I know their site sucks but yes that is a program I took here. I will write you guys more later, for yes, I know you enjoy hearing from me (LOL.)

Father Dudley

father.dudley

 

 

 

Hey Circle,

Sorry it has been a while since I have written.  I am good.  I guess you could say I am happy.  Just my family has pretty much given up on me.  I haven’t been able to talk to my son since God knows when.

I have been crocheting with thread, grappling pictures and stuff.  I love birds.  I have seen a fat little bird going to the dentist.  A red hawk, some crows and of course, seagulls.

If I could be a bird I would be a dove like “Pietrie,” my dove that my little man found in a mud puddle.

Well, write back.

Lawless

arline-lawless-3

Circle:

How’s it going? I guess you could say I am doing good, but fuck, still have not heard from my mother, so to put it: no, I really don’t hear from my family anymore.

I guess you could say I am working on getting my e-mail here, so yes, I hope to get that next week, but fuck, I still need money just to use it (LOL.)

I guess you could say right now I could careless about playing with fire when it comes to writing D.S. For yes, I don’t hear from Lori, but I don’t call right now, I don’t even write her.

So hey, just in case they let me have my email, what is your addy so I can put it on-line for it might work better.

I would say any pictures you want to send me would be okay, for I like them all (LOL.) I don’t see much of my life on the outs.

I am getting a new pair of glasses soon, as I get more money I will need to get a picture for you guys for you know just how it is. Sorry it’s been forever since I wrote for as you see I write the printer here has been down so I couldn’t get labels and you can’t send out mail if you don’t have them. I’m headed out to see if they fixed it tomorrow for I don’t have classes again ’til Monday. Fuck, it has been a long week (LOL.)

I am going to head to bed now, but I will always keep praying for you guys.

God bless,

Father Dudley

father.dudley

Well, it’s May and I am seeing lots of green grass now and lots of flowers.  Plus a bunch of birds other than seagulls.

Have you read any comic books lately?  I heard that Peter Parker, aka Spiderman got killed by Doctor Octopus in issue 700 of the Amazing Spiderman.  I wonder if they brought him back to life or if someone else stepped into his webs as the new Spiderman.

Remember – it’s Friday the thirteenth.  Anything weird or unusual happen that day?  Well, I’m going to  chill out now and watch some of the Friday the 13th movies.

Good night.

Kenneth McDonald

kenny

Hey Circle,

How are you?  I guess you could say I a good for now.  I am glad you say my kids look good for Lori hasn’t even sent me a picture of them in over a year.

I don’t know what Lori’s deal is, all I know is she said that she was filing for divorce,  so fuck, I just have not really been doing all that much.

I will write another blog soon, but I just need to get money for a copy card so I can copy more of my sermons for you guys, for I only get one copy of stuff here.  I just need to wait and see how long it takes for me to get the copy  card.

I would love to hear from Dark Star, for yes, it would be great to hear from her.  I would love to be able to get more form people for yes, it feels lonely not hearing from people and losing my family and friends.  I guess I will have to find someone who can print out some pictures of my kids for I would love to see them soon, but still awaiting money to call my mom.  She don’t write me.  I guess she is going to write me soon, but that is what I always hear (LOL).  I guess most people only know how to say that they are going to do something soon.

God bless,

Joel

joel

 

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Political Prisoners

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