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I’ve been a little depressed as of late, myself.  You know how guys in jail can get.  I had some guy tell me I should have killed myself after Zina, “She went out gangsta.”

I was thinking, “Yeah, and she left our son and me here.”  as I walked away.  This guy is obviously not the brightest bulb in the box.  Still, it left me angry at Zina again.

Once guy tried to convince me she may still be alive, “You don’t know.  She could be in protective custody.”  I  swear.  I’m surrounded by lawyers and psychologists in here.  Luckily, I”m a little too bright to fall for this shit.

Still… my grieving for Zina is a manic call back.  some days, I’m fine.  Other days it’s a relentless roller coaster.

Just when I had given up on talking to anyone, I had a guy I didn’t recognize call me “Dirty.(my tag name.)”  We started talking and I  asked him if he knew Zina.  He said yes, “She was a beautiful girl.”

When he said that all these images of her, the really good times came flooding back.  That’s when I realized that that’s how I want to remember her.. as beautiful.

I can’t tell you why or how I endure this.  I do believe there’s a reason I’m still alive.  I don’t know why, but I plan on finding out.

I’d enjoy mail from anyone.  My address is:

Michael McQuade / Somerset County Jail / 132 East Madison Road / Madison, Maine 04950.

Tell everyone that I said “hi!”

God bless,




What’s going on?

Alot’s been going on with me.  My post conviction got denied and I did not handle it well.  I allegedly got into a fight and as a result I got kicked out of the college program one semester before graduating.  Also I waved my rights as I may have charges.  For a while things were bad.

I’m better now.  But it was tough and for a little bit I spent Christmas and New Years locked down in seg like I said.  I’m better now, but extremely disappointed in myself.  It is what it is, though.  Another lesson learned.




Hey, Circle,

How is everyone?  I could be better for hell, I don’t know just how this will ll end.  As for Lori and I, we are good from what I know.

If you guys could send me a copy of the Prisoner Free List, that would be great, for yes, it was just thinking of it the other day.  And of course, you could say ULC of CC would be great working hard with a few good brothers here.  As of right now, I am at work for, fuck man, I got a job here.  I work in the school here, yeah, as of now I am out of here, 08/09/2019, for fuck, who knows, I am still working my appeal.

God, I could go for a smoke if they let me I would smoke on (LOL) sorry, my writing sucks.  Been up for three days working on lesion plans (LOL.)  As you guys found out, I am in New York for now.  I should be back in Maine in no time.  Yes, of course now I need to fight for it.  I need to put the true perp away for this crap.

God bless,

Father Dudley

Ordained Minister and Universal Priest, ULC



I’m taking eight different classes.  I turned 54 in November.  If you people don’t mind, and can would you please send me some money for commissary, plus we can smoke, $5.84 for 1839 and I have to bum cigarettes and it’s so hard to find one.

Last weekend during visits a girl had some pills brought in so we all had to go to our rooms and weren’t allowed to go to the bathroom until you were drug tested.  They were taking so long that my room ate and I used our waste can.  They also brought a dog in.  Four women got sent back to Windham Prison for being dirty.



Hello to the world outside the gates!

I wanted to give a big thank you to everyone and anyone who supports a prisoner, and I mean, in any way, from postcards to prayers.  If it wasn’t for all of you and your support, I think a great deal of us would just give up, expire.

Every letter that we get in here is like Christmas, I swear to you.


And I know that you’ve been meaning to write that long letter, but you don’t have to.  I mean, I’d love the long letter, but who knows when that will get done?  It’s always cool to get a postcard, or any mail.

Thanks to everyone who’s supported and supporting me, especially, my girl, Catia.  Thank you, love.

And thank you, everyone!




here I am at the women’s correctional center, up at Windham Prison.  I got sentenced back in September.  I got nine years all suspended but 18 months and four-year probation.

I don’t care for the levels, you spend about 21 hours in your room.  There’s three levels and on level three you can stay out until midnight.  I’m already in a double cell.  I have a very good roommate.  She’s negro and a lesbian.

I can’t wait for classes to start.  I signed up for three of them.  They now have a pre-release for the women, but I don’t care if I go there of stay here.  They have a really good commissary and you can spend up to $100.00 and they have three different care packages that people on the outside can order you.  Next month I might have Pete order me one.  I’m really hoping to run Pete and my nephew through so they can come for a visit, the both of them held me up at county.  I know that when I get out of here I’ve got to buckle down and behave myself.  I’ve got a lot of time hanging and certainly don’t want to go back to county.

Boy, there’s room restriction crazy here, a lot of women are doing room restriction.

I can’t wait until commissary on monday.  Supper was lousy tonight.  Beans, hotdogs, coleslaw, biscuit, apple, juice, water.

Please write me, guys.  I’m really hoping to hear from you.  Please!


Miss Linda

Dear guys and girls,

How are you?  Was glad to get another letter from Circle today.  I’d like you to know that it means a lot to me, that you guys stayed in touch throughout all of this.. so thank you, my friends.

Well, not much has changed since my last letter.  Same shit, different day!  I’m hoping to start working in the community in the next couple of weeks.  I’m just waiting for someone to be transferred to Hallowell.

I’m in the writers group here and we just published a book entitled “Echoes of the Heart.”  I have 5 or 6 poems in there, and the book will be for sale to the public in the industry store.

If you have access to a printer, could you print me out some Buddhist or even old Celtic prayers and/or meditations?  It would be nice to have good things to put into my head and temporarily escape my surroundings.

I guess that’s about it, for now.  I hope this letter finds everyone well.  Take care and hope to hear from you soon.

Untill next time then.

Many blessings,

Phil Dharma Punk

Hi, free world.  How are you?  I’m fine, thanks, and a little pale.

Windham Prison is kind of an unpleasent place to be, yet these things happen when you’re doing things that do not agree with your center, or the Tao.  So, I’m serving 16 months in prison because I was staying with the “victim” of my domestic violence case.  The State said “Don’t go see her.”  And I did, anyway.  What made things worse is that she did some things (constantly) that my ego, psyche and person/human-hood would not stand for, whether (spell check) or not she admits it.  With this time I have decided to re-evaluate everything I have ever known and hopefully learn some new things.

Day to day is inconvenient.  I can’t do all the things I could on the street.  I miss smoking cigs the most.  But I get by, being in A-Pod or going throught the classification process is no fun.  We are locked down 21 hours a day.  There aren’t many programs availavble here; it’s limited to one library book by request form a week and  bible study.  And that’s everything,.  I have seen a head-shrinker, a substance abuse councillor, and a nurse.  Time seems to be going smoothly despite the lock-down time.  “Lord of  Chaos” by Robert Jorden helps the time pass rather well.  I hope “Atlas Shrugged” by Ayn Rand does the same.  I think the education director told me to be well.

That reminds me of someone I know, which then reminds me of a delusional stuffed bear.  But, that, like most things, is beside the point.  All right-minded people and some that are not can really do only one thing in here.  Try to make the best of our time.  Speaking of time, that’s all I have for you this week, so I’ll see you in the next.

Yours truly,
Truly yours,


There are things I thought I knew, and it turns out that my ideas and knowledge are that of a sheltered little boy.  Yeah, I know, I wouldn’t have classified myself as sheltered either, but there is so much out there beyond me and the little I know.  Right now, my head is a mess.  I am battling the pain and horror of learning that childhood beliefs in the world and myself are false.  I am evolving, becoming so much smarter and stronger, but it is not easy.  I do not wish/want to return to the ignorance and naivety that defined me but I do recognize how ignorance is bliss.  I have had to learn some very painful truth about my abilities or lack of them in the last month or so.  It is all worth it though.  I am becoming the best I can be.  Which is doubly important so that when I come home I will be able to be successful and no, I am not trying to become a better criminal, even though knowledge is power.  Hahaha.

As I am,


I have been wondering.  Brothers, all I know, when I get out in August, sometime.

I can still remember being in Windham.  When Jason, Rage and I were lifting weights, we had some fun and got big.  What’s been going on with Father Dudley?  I don’t hear from him anymore.  We had a lot of fun in Windham, even when we went to the pow wows in Windham.

Well, brothers, I will sign off for now and write me.

I haven’t forgot about Spain, and I still want to go over there and I want to go somewhere else also like Hong Kong or Asia or even go to Alaska, so I can drive truck, make a lot of money, you know.

Brothers, I’m gonna wrap this up.  Everyone have a good day.  Peace brothers.  Aho my red brothers.

John Redcorn

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Political Prisoners

Welcome to the blog from inmates of Maine's jails and prisons.

In collaboration with the Holistic Recovery Project, the Political Prisoners Blog provides a prisoner's view into what's happening at Maine's correctional facilities.

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